I’ve read many religious tomes; Amarr, Brutor, Jovian, even an occasional Terran manuscript or two, which are hard to come by. They all seem to have the same general ideas on morality: live right, do right, reap your eternal reward, etc, etc, which is where I guess the appeal comes from for most. Being immortal already, it loses its lustre quickly: live right, live wrong, do right, do wrong, what does it really matter? When will I face the deity/deities of your choosing for my rewards/punishments? Yes, I acknowledge there is the chance of the True Death, and it does occur, but seldomly.

Chances are I will outlive your religion.

I guess some would say the rewards/punishments aren’t always saved for the afterlife, that sometimes karma will deal with you during your life. If there is any truth to that, then I would imagine karma’s a bitch to pod pilots, given the scope of our influence over the galaxy. Still, I’ve seen decades of despicable acts from certain pod pilots and their reward has been nothing but fame and profit. I suppose eventually there is the chance things could even out, but I don’t attribute that to karma. I attribute that to bad decisions.

I think religion is really just an excuse to absolve ourselves of responsibility in the end. If I’m honest with myself, 99% of the deaths I have personally experienced have been from a poor decision on my part, and instead of listening to what my gut was telling me, I gave into the heat of the moment. Karma? Your choice to believe what you will.

To me it’s like the man that pleads he “lost control” when he flew into a rage and beat his spouse near to death. It wasn’t his fault. She made him so angry he lost control. I wonder if that same man has ever spontaneously urinated? That would be an actual example of losing control. No, the truth is he made a bad decision. Sometimes justice is served, sometimes not. More decisions.

I don’t even really know if I have a point in this. I suppose that’s why I’ve entitled this journal of mine “Roc’s Ramblings”, as I do sometimes get lost within my own thoughts and ramble on. I can only imagine what I will be like a thousand years from now.

Another thing I have noticed with religion is that the moral compass we are given is often incomplete and contradictory. Sometimes there will be one direction saying to do this, yet then an example of the saviour or holy figure doing just the opposite. Or there are huge gaps in the chonology of the document. In some, it is admitted that certain pieces were lost, undiscovered, what have you. But in others there is the consensus that these volumes were never meant to be a history lesson but rather guidelines to live our lives by.

I can accept that.

I mean look at me, look at this journal. Do I detail every moment of my life? Sure, I sometimes mention the most mundane of things that I find interesting or humourous, but I don’t give detail to every bowel movement or sexual encounter; I guess I too omit things in order to give a general feel for what I find to be important.

Some quick examples that come to mind are the tales of Mynxee and I across the years that have remained untold, the more recent tale of Dahlia, and the profound influence she has had on me, even as I write this entry. I have hundreds of war stories left to tell from my time in the Tribal Liberation Force, and I just realized I never finished the explanation of that very old woman that shocked my life by revealing that I had known her as a child and hadn’t changed at all.

I think it’s time for me to finish off many of these tales, before my time runs out.

A funny thought just occured to me. Does the fact that I am sharing my most profound life lessons as a legacy to those that come after mean that I am a religion? I suppose I could be a cult at least. I mean the only difference between a cult and a religion is the number of followers.

The Cult O Roc.

It kind of has a nice ring to my ego.