More gym. More drones. More grit. More Roc. Use that pain, that emotion to fuel you forward. Driven. Focused. My year. Get more done. Longing. Loneliness. Fuel. I got this, just like a thousand times before. Me. Pushing against the universe.

Slam that medicine ball harder into the ground. Focus every frustration. Harder. They all haven’t stopped to stare. Harder. Keep going. Pain is only temporary. I’ll breather later. Once more. Harder. Nothing exists but this moment. No past. No future. Only now.

Harder.

And I just jammed my finger. Harder. Dammit.

I finished the entire routine, finger pulsating. Such a small fragile thing. Hurt like a mother.

Woke up the next morning unable to move it. Doc’s going start thinking I just like seeing him.