It’s not all glamourous. It’s not all fun and games. Every action has a consequence; good or bad.
—
“Roc Wieler, you are under arrest. The charges are two counts of aggravated assault, one count of assault. You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to …” I had tuned them out already, withdrawing deep inside of my own mind. What I had done? It would be all too convenient to say to you that I had no memory of it; that some type of miraculous hole had occured during my rage filled attack on that group of commuters. I can’t in good conscience do that though. I am fully aware of what I have done; I am simply in shock that I did it.
Magtrain security had responded quickly to the train’s sudden lurch, as pressing the strip engaged the braking system, bringing the train to a halt and notifying security of exactly in which train car the strip was pressed. They arrived on the scene amidst my melee assault on those four passengers whom had given me the letter full of mucus.
The two security personnel engaged me, trying to pull me off of one of the females, whom I was in the midst of punching repeatedly in the face. Some people don’t realize how vicious women can be; far more dangerous than men, both physically and emotionally. She had scratched long clawmarks down my face, and had kicked me in the groin. I don’t discriminate when it comes to combat. If you attack me, I will put you down.
They pulled me onto the floor of the train, yet still I struggled, headbutting one of them clean across the bridge of his nose. His grip released, as his hands reactively moved to cover the injury, leaving me free to deliver a meaty hook to his partner. By now though, two more security personnel had arrived.
I was restrained until the train could arrive at its next station, where CONCORD was awaiting me to press more formal charges.
I was taken to the nearest CONCORD station, thrown in a holding cell, and left to consider my actions. I had been doing nothing but since the incident.
It only takes one choice, one moment, to change your entire life. I was being charged as a civilian; no military or capsuleer special privileges this time. My name would make the news, and not in the way it had in the recent past. There would be no coverup. This could end my military career.
When I was asked whom I would like to call, I had chosen my CEO. I figured he might at least have some pull on the civilian side of things. Instead, when I was finished being processed, given the terms of my release, and guaranteed I would show for my court date, it was my CEO who via vidphone, reminded me of corporate policies regarding criminal activity, then wrote me up on disciplinary action, letting me know that if anything like this happened again I would be terminated from the corporation.
I also had a call from General Fist, letting me know that in addition to the civilian charges I was now facing, I would also be charged as a war criminal, and made an example of. Abuse of power would not be tolerated within the ranks of the Republic.
I’ve had people tell me to let go of my anger in the past. I’ve done the blame game, where it’s everyone else’s fault but my own. I am not that person anymore.
I accept the consequences of my actions. I know there will be reprecussions. I’m just so very tired of the idiots in the world. The sad part, of course, is that aside from the one I hospitalized, the rest of that group from the magtrain will go about their lives just the same, having never learned a damned thing.
Maybe I should just be woefully ignorant. Maybe I should just give up caring about anything, as it seems the more you try to do what’s right and good, the more you get bit in the ass for it.
I don’t know; it’s been a trying day. I just needed to writed my thoughts down. I have a lot to consider over the coming weeks.
And I totally forgot about my datacores.
ROC'S RAMBLINGS 
OK, first off, no details on the fight? Sure it’s difficult to write, but a good knowledge of biology and martial arts makes it easy as pie. Your call though.
Secondly, General Fist? Are you trying to get me fired? I was laughing WAY too loud at work after reading that.
Lastly, if you end up in jail and need to meet someone who can provide insight, I offer Gigaer. I’m not sure if you’ve read Last Son of Prano, but I can give you a quick overview of his character if you want.
I’m so tempted to try and convince you to give up that regimented life and become a low sec outlaw. I doubt I could, but at least we are (mostly) free to punish the idiots of New Eden with extreme prejudice when they venture into our domain.
*looks around and smiles in childlike wonder…the sky is full of stars!*
Punch them!
HARDER!
😦
@Psyche – Describing the fight is not the issue. I recall every moment with perfect clarity. I chose not to describe the fight as I regret the entire incident, and exciting my readers by brutal detail of an encounter only encourages behaviour that I am trying to get away from.
@Mynxee – Who knows what the future holds? Lowsec is starting to look better and better to me. I just want a place where I can be left in peace and quiet. And if anyone can convince me, it’s you.
And yeah, I decided to be festive. Snow on the blog for the holidays, joy.
By “readers” you mean Mynxee, don’t you. Yeah, she pretends not to be the violent type, but we all know better then to cross that particular pirate.
BTW, Snow is cool, even though it’s slowing down my netbook.
I don’t know if it’s intentional or planned, but it seems that Roc is slowly distancing himself from the military and corporate life. I predict a personal re-evaluation in the near future, deciding to throw off the shackles of a previous life and pursue a whole new venture.
@ Leumas: such is life in EVE. Despite what happens and where you are in the galaxy, you can decide to change and go another direction. There are other regions of space to explore, new entities to woo, new spoils to be conquered.
And yeah, a life a piracy ain’t all that bad. We were the originators of democracy you know!
@ my icon: at least I’m not square.
Ooh, the snow follows my cursor! Weeee
Easily amused. Love your writing style
What’s with my miserable looking icon?
@Leumas @Sard agreed.
@Ombey
Yay, I also love the snow following my cursors and slowly falling along as I scroll down!
I have never related more to anything ever in my life. In fact, on a forum I am a regular of, I made a thread of my growing impatience with the stupidity of the world.
I guess this is part of the reason I am so enthusiastic about reading this, aside from your great writing skill, is how similar I am to Roc. Both extremely military by design, impatient with stupidity, quite serious (not ALL the time for me of course), and overflowing with ego (I got a great chuckle reading the shrink bits, his sarcasm is EXACTLY how I would have reacted).
Granted, I am nowhere near as built as Roc, nor as readily violent. Only in my dreamland would I be able to inflict as much bodily harm to idiots as he could.
I know, I am VERY late on reading this. I can’t help it, I started playing EVE this year, but I’d like to just say a huge thank you for doing the EVE community a favor with this blog.
And yet I completely appreciate you taking the time to both read and comment on my entires.
I sincerely am grateful that people can relate to my writing on any level, and strive to get better and better at it.
He’s not the only one who can relate to your writing, I’ve been reading through your archives for the past few weeks and love them. actually they where able to inspire me to start writing again and start up my own blog so cheers roc and thanks.
Again, completely flattered and appreciative. I hope you enjoy this coming year.