I’ve been working out of the Ortner Constellation in Heimatar for quite a while now. Even before the war began, this was where I was often found. 

It’s not just the women; nor the fact that it’s home. While I enjoy both of those immensely, what really has kept me here these past couple of years is a dirty little dive of a bar on Rens VI – Moon 8 called “The Hole”. Go figure.

I’ve been a regular there since first coming to this region. I’ve had quite a few intimate encounters there, as well as some most memorable brawls. I’ve passed out there. I’ve worked there. I’ve done other things there that I probably shouldn’t mention.

I could tell you countless stories until your eyelids become so heavy you can’t even stay awake, and not because of boredom, but from sheer volume. That’s what life is really about isn’t it? If you don’t have any stories to share when you’re done, well, you didn’t live much of a life did you?

As a regular, I haven’t had to actually place my order in months. I simply walk in, slide up to the bar, and within seconds my usual drink is placed in front of me. It’s the small pleasures in life that make me smile.

Last week, the owner decided it was time to have a signature drink in the bar, so opened it up to the public for entries. You know, the typical marketing ploy to drive more busienss to the bar.

Without my knowing, the fulltime bartender entered my regular brew into the contest, and it won. No real prize. No real thrill. I will admit though, it’s amusing to have a drink named after me. Here’s the recipe if you’re Matari enough to try it, and yes, it’s a real drink:

Roc’s Revenge

Half fill a regular glass with a mix of tomato juice and a double shot of vodka.

Layer french mustard on top of the tomato juice. Do NOT mix.

Squeeze fresh lime on top.

Serve with an unused feminine hygiene product instead of an umbrella.

Enjoy, ladies.