Blog Banter #24 – Me

Welcome to the twenty-fourth installment of the EVE Blog Banter, the monthly EVE Online blogging extravaganza created by CrazyKinux. The EVE Blog Banter involves an enthusiastic group of gaming bloggers, a common topic within the realm of EVE Online, and a week or so to post articles pertaining to the said topic. The resulting articles can either be short or quite extensive, either funny or dead serious, but are always a great fun to read! Any questions about the EVE Blog Banter should be directed to Check for other EVE Blog Banter articles at the bottom of this post!

This month’s Banter topic comes to us from the ever helpful Eelis Kiy, capsuleer behind the “Where the frack is my ship” blog. She asks: How does your real life personality compare to who you are as a character in EVE? Does a good leader of people in the real world make a good leader of pilots in game? Or vice-versa? Do your real-life skills help you with the roles you fulfill in your corporation or alliance? Or do you behave completely differently? Does the anonymity of the Internet allow you to thrive on the tears of others in New Eden whilst you work as a good Samaritan away from your keyboard? Or are you as mean outside of your pod as you are inside it? Have experiences in EVE Online affected your behavior, skills or attitudes outside of the game?

Where is the line between what is real and what is not? It is clearly marked, a concise beacon that once stepped across is known? Or is it shades of grey, a thick fog, each one of us able to penetrate to different depths before becoming hopelessly lost within?

Who am I?

I am a man, nothing more, nothing less. I anger. I lash out. I am passionate, and loving. I fantasize. I keep myself grounded. I fight. I smile. I cry. I bleed. I make wise choices. I make mistakes.

Are there things I wish I could’ve done differently? Are there things I exaggerate to accentuate a point? Is it all fabrication and story telling, or is there some grain of truth to it all?

Does it matter?

Is it even possible to differentiate between our real selves and the fantasy? Some postulate that the whole is three parts: how we see ourselves, how we envision others seeing us, and how they really do see us.

If that is true, then what is fantasy and what is real becomes even more indiscernible. Real spills over into fantasy spills over into real. It is inevitable.


Do the actions of the now me create the me five years from now? Was the me five years ago much different? Is it the company I keep? What makes me real to begin with? What makes me fantasy? Am I a real fantasy?

I am Roc. Roc am I.


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