I sat in the waiting area, looking at the other pod pilots, listening to a muzak version of “A Jita Welcome”, which really sounded awful to me, but I suppose was flattering to already be redone as a soothing piece to pass the time.

There was minor small talk amongst the waiting patients, but generally I wasn’t interested in the lives of other immortals; it was typically the same rhetoric about killboards, uberness and how awesome they were in every way. I couldn’t really hear them over the sound of how bad ass I am.

“Roc Wieler, the physician will see you.” the comely receptionist said, inviting me to longer wait in a private room. Finally, the doctor was available to see me.

“So, what seems to be the problem today?” he began, as they always do.

“Embarassingly, I have this intermittent and completely random pain in my big toe. When it happens, I can’t even walk. There’s no consistency to it, nothing I can isolate to cause it to happen, but it’s annoying as hell, and inconvenient to be immobilized by such a stupid thing.” I explained.

“I see.” he said, as they always do. “Could be any number of regular ailments, but typically you capsuleers aren’t susceptible to those things. Maybe you’ve a faulty clone.”

Lovely, I thought to myself.

“Let’s order up some tests.” he said, as they always do.

Several hours later, XRays, bone scans, CT Scans and other tests all revealed nothing conclusive.

“Well, I suppose it could be arthritis, in which case you’ll just have to cope with it.” he said, as they always do. “Not much can be done. I wouldn’t worry too much about it. In your line of work, you’re sure to be in a fresh clone soon anyway. I’d just check with your med techs to verify it’s not something being copied into your duplicates.”

I didn’t like that answer. I had no intentions of dying again soon, and certainly didn’t want to have to “cope” with something that had proven enough of a hindrance to me to seek medical advice, something I did reluctantly in the best of scenarios.

“Well, is there something I can do in the meantime?” I implored.

“Of course. I could prescribe some drugs to help reduce inflammation and numb the pain, but you’re best bet is stay off the foot.” he said. “I see here that you’re physically active. That will have to be on indefinite hiatus to give yourself time to heal; 6 – 8 weeks then we’ll meet again.”

Yeah, that wasn’t going to happen.

“Not one for drugs, doc.” I said, memories of Vitoc and other substances I’d endured having developed within me a hatred for all things unnatural. “There any natural remedies I can try?”

The doctor sighed, looking around as if checking to see if he was being spied upon, then leaned in close as if to tell me a wondrous secret.

“Look,” he began. “I shouldn’t be telling you this, but I will.” he said with a conspiratorial twinkle in his eyes. “Legally, diseases can only be treated with drugs. To prescribe anything else could actually result in me going to jail.”

“You’re shitting me.” I said, curious as to the rationale for his conspiracy theory.

“Regrettably, I wish that were the case. You see, there are many natural remedies for pretty much anything that ails you. The problem is, they can’t be patented, as they are natural. Chribba Pharmaceuticals, and a few of the other lager pharma companies literally have agreements in place with the Concord Drug Administration. While you would think drugs would be effectual and beneficial to the public they are meant to serve, they often have side effects worse than the current ailment, but the pharma companies and the CDA aren’t looking out for the public; they’re in it to protect stockholders, which means showing a profit, being in the black. Simply put, curing disease isn’t profitable, so they don’t want to do it.”

I wanted to pick apart his theory, but quickly recalling my own experiences, I couldn’t help but come to the same conclusion. Pharma companies were businesses, and all businesses wanted to profit. Eliminating your customer base resulted in the extinction of your companies, and knowing some of the mega corporations, and the trillions of isk they made, that would never happen. As with many things, it was all politics and back room deals.

“Give a quick search on GalNet.” he said. “You’ll find any number of natural solutions there that will help you out.” He paused for a moment. “You’re lucky really.” he said, letting the statement hang in the air.

“Oh?” I asked, prompting him to continue.

“Definitely. Just had a pilot in here who picked up a nasty parasite during a recon mission to a nullsec world. It literally incubates in the testicles, and by the time it’s ready to gestate, it’s too late. Within a matter of minutes, the testes swell up to the size of melons, then literally hatch from the inside out, the parasites exploding onto the flesh of the host, eating as they go. Intermittent toe pain really doesn’t seem that bad now, does it?” he said with a grin.

“Yeah, I’m good.” I said, the colour drained from my face.

For example, some of my long term readers might remember this post DYNAMIC LANDSCAPES. TL;DR? RTS style AI working towards goals from a random objective pool.

We all have ideas. 

For years, I’ve approached companies like Sony Online Entertainment with my ideas. I was a day one Star Wars Galaxies vet (RIP), and very active in the community there, so figured my voice might get heard. It didn’t of course. Heck, I even managed to get a small contract from Lucasarts and still couldn’t get my voice heard.

So, being Canadian, I tried to approach an up and coming Canadian Gaming House called Bioware. They had one or two good games at the time, but of course, my voice wasn’t heard.

Over the years I’ve made contacts with various game companies like Electronic Arts, CCP, and others, but the result is always the same:

Nobody wants to hear your ideas. Ideas are a dime a dozen. Create your idea into a working prototype, then show us.

It’s like every client I’ve ever dealt with. They need to see it to get it. So I’ve built several prototypes over my career in the hopes of maybe one day seeing my own game design ideas realized. So far, no luck.

I’d even thought of going on my own, getting some venture capital backing, and produce my vision that way. I acquired very practical experience about Venture Capitalism during that time, and just how much work is involved in getting someone else to invest money in you. Needless to say, that avenue didn’t work out for me either.

Nowadays, things are different. There is a little website called Kickstarter.com. This wonderful little website basically allows you to pitch your idea, maybe even showcase your prototype, and if people are interested, they’ll invest some money in you. If enough people are interested, you will have a cash pool in which to pursue your business. Simple, effective, smart, and just one of the many things I love about the way technology has caused a shift in the way people think.

So, let’s get down to the nitty gritty.

If you’re here at my blog, chances are you know I’m a fiction writer. I enjoy good writing, especially good science fiction. I won’t tell you my favourite authors, as we all have our opinions, and this thread isn’t meant to start a discussion on whom is the better writer, but the point is that I enjoy good writing.

So what is good writing to me? It’s in the details, the author’s ability to drag me into their vision, allowing me to feel as if I’m part of their lore. The story has to move, it can’t be stagnant with too much detail, or move so quickly that I really don’t feel a part of it. To find this balance is a challenge for sure. I’ve read some series that could’ve been done in one book instead of ten, had they removed a lot of the unnecessary details. I’ve read other books that should’ve been expanded into a series, adding more details to flesh out their world a little more, to make me believe it exists.

This is what I enjoy most about Star Wars, Eve Online, and even can appreciate about Star Trek, though I’m not a fan. They all have extensive universes that are very well fleshed out, giving me an extensive guideline as to what I can, and cannot, do in my own fictional writing within those universes.

Take Roc for example. CCP has created such a vast tapestry for New Eden, that not only do I know all the cultural and historical histories of the Minmatar, but I know about current events through the RP RSS feeds, I know about politics, I know about the Brutor Tribe, I know about the current war efforts; I know a lot of things.

I know that Roc can die outside of his pod. I know much about the lore of pods, and capsuleers. I know a lot about Roc.

But it is also difficult to maintain lore. The more extensive it becomes, the more writers become involved, the greater the chance of inconsistencies being introduced. As readers, as players, we’re quick to jump all over that kind of thing.

For example, in Tony G’s latest novel, Templar One, there are a couple of things that irk me personally: one scientific character refers to the fibonacci patterns on the floor of a Sleeper station. How would anyone from the timeline of New Eden know what the hell a fibonacci sequence is? They wouldn’t, but it’s not critical to anything, and doesn’t really break the story. It simply breaks my suspension of disbelief in the lore of New Eden, and I find that bothersome.

Another example, also from Templare One, is Empress Sarum Jamyl talking with a character about fame and power, about being known internationally … really? Your fame and power extends internationally, your majesty? What about the millions of lives you mentioned earlier, and your vast empire of planets? Ugh. Little things. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really enjoying Templar One. I’m just trying to make a point.

But I am seriously digressing on what my intended topic was.

Basically, my aim is to create a science fiction MMO. But I’m going to forgo having any backstory. I refuse to create such a rich lore for my universe. In fact, my game isn’t going to have any features either, as I refuse to have my efforts criticized from players that are never satisfied.

Essentially, it’s going to be nothing but a login screen with a lengthy queue, and then a text based chat engine, without emoticons. What will make it really sexy is the name restricting algorithm I have nearly perfected. Take a look at the screenshot below:

That’s right. This entire post was crap simply to make the point that players are idiots. The amount of time, money and effort some of these game companies spend creating their universes, and we decide the best roleplay name we can come up with is Hugh Wang (yes, I’m looking at you Rens local).

Seriously, it’s pathetic, says the guy named Roc Wieler. But at least I came up with a backstory for my name!

The least we can do to respect these universes is take two or three minutes to create a suitable name. I mean, EVE Online even has a random surname generator!

Or try this:

• merge your first and last name – Mine is Marcus Dickinson, so Mardic. Not perfect, but not bad.
• change the vowels in your first name – Morcis, that’s pretty cool.
• change the order of your name – Sucram, hahah, ok that’s not much better.
• use a random name generator

Did that really take ANY effort? No. So please, next time you join a game, don’t be an idiot. Think of an actual sci-fi sounding name and give my facepalming a break. My forehead grows sore.

Instead, I’m simply going to talk about our great Eve community, and why Eve is dead.

53,981 visits were logged to my humble blog on Dec 24th and Dec 25th of this year.

Those were the two days I gave away my four previous Eve Online inspired albums, as well as a bonus Christmas album. I can’t tell you the statistics on how many downloads there were, but I can tell you my dropbox died in 13 minutes, resulting in a 3 day account suspension. There was such a volume that I had to send out a cry for help to my fans, which resulted in two unlimited bandwidth servers being made available in short order, as well as a premium Rapidshare account. That seemed to satisfy the hungered lust of the Eve players.

Since then, I’ve done searches on torrent sites and other music sharing platforms, and now see my music everywhere: over two year’s worth of personal effort out there for the masses to enjoy.

I have no regrets about that. I’m glad it’s being listened to.

So how is Eve dead? It’s not. It’s a sarcastic title. Eve is very much alive.

Almost 54,000 visits to one small Eve fansite, only advertised via my Twitter account and the EVE Online Facebook page. That’s frickin insane if you think about it from a ratio perspective. If there are roughly 350,000 players, and 54,000 are interested enough in all things Eve to find out about my giveaway, that’s nearly 20% of the entire Eve playerbase! Eve has the most active and fanatical community I’ve ever seen! I mean seriously! If ever there had been that many purchases of my music from iTunes, Zune, Amazon, or any of the other 30 digital distributors I am promoted on, I could’ve had my mortgage paid off by now and focused on everything Roc Wieler full time, but noooo, you greedy bastards decided $10 per album to support someone creating custom music for you was just too much, and instead devoured it only when it was free!

I kid, but still, geez…

I’m just rambling now, so I guess I’ll wrap this up with what I could’ve TL;DR from the beginning:

Happy New Year, from me to all of you. I’m proud to share New Eden with each of you.

PS. Because of the giveaway, one Eve player commissioned me to do a theme for the Caldari State Protectorate, the capsuleer military division of the Caldari State. I successfully completed the commission yesterday, and have been given permission to share it with all of you. Enjoy!

PPS. If you want to help me out and know any professional gaming or film companies looking for a music composer, send them my way.

“We are the State, and we have claimed our long-lost homeland. Now we are at war; united, whole and full of fire and purpose. The State calls you, capsuleer, for it needs your strength and your leadership to fend off the encroaching Gallente menace. The State will not fall. Join us. Fight. Conquer.” —State Protectorate corporate description

CLICK HERE to download the Caldari State Protectorate theme.

PPPS. And just as I was saving this post, my email rang. WordPress sent me my ANNUAL BLOG REPORT. It seems to not include the last week or so of activity, which is unfortunate, but I figure we’ll include the report, just for fun!

So, I relied on my instincts, my routines and habits, to get me through the day. That is to say, I was at the gym.

I was just winding down on the final week of my current workout program; a grueling six weeks of body shredding goodness, which had been quite effective, but incredibly draining, mentally and physically.

That’s when I first saw Malcolm come into the gym. Of course, I didn’t know his name then, but I would never forget him.

He pushed forward in his motorized chair towards the squat bar. He was dark skinned, even for a Brutor, his tribal markings faded, but there was still a glint of life in his eyes which intrigued me. I was walking a lap in between 100m wind sprints, and saw him struggling with something in the front carry basket on his chair.

“Need a hand old timer?” I asked, a friendly smirk on my face.

He smiled warmly, asking if I could get his exercise gloves from a bag buried at the bottom of his basket. He told me how he struggled getting his gloves on as he no longer had any feeling in his hands, then laughed.

I found his gloves and helped him get them on, which was quite the struggle as his hands were gnarled and lifeless, his fingers more like claws than anything, stiff and unyielding. I was afraid of snapping them as I tried to delicately get them through the appropriate finger holes.

All the while, Malcolm and I chatted, as I was genuinely curious about his story.

“I served in the TLF a few years back, gunner 1st class.” He beamed with pride at both his membership in the Tribal Liberation Force, the capsuleer assault force of the Minmatar Militia, and his privileged rank; his lack of pod pilot control receptacles made it obvious he wasn’t of my kind.

“We were engaged in a firefight out in Auga, Amarr forces everywhere. We had been baited good. I had signed up for service like so many from my district, the lure of unlimited wealth outweighing the certainty of death. Times were tough, still are tough; how could I say no to that?”

I nodded in agreement as I continued to fidget with his gloves.

“Our pilot issued the ‘abandon ship’ protocol, those damned klaxons blaring mercilessly in our ears. We did as we had been trained to do, and made our way to the escape pods. I was halfway down my egress corridor when the bulkhead blew, taking my entire gunnery team with it. In the blink of an eye I lost a dozen good men and women, but there wasn’t even time for it to register before the debris hit me, severing me just below the waist.”

He pointed down at his chair, at the stumps where his legs used to be.

“The entire corridor decompressed around me, and I thought for certain I was going to be crushed into oblivion, then and there. Cliched as it sounds, my life flashed before my eyes: falling in love, proposing, marriage, children, grandchildren, all of it. More than anything I was saddened I would never get to see any of my family again. I couldn’t even think about how much money they would be paid at my death; I wanted to live.”

He looked at me again, a smoldering fire in his eyes, and once again I nodded, urging him to continue as I struggled to get his thumbs into the gloves.

“I couldn’t tell you what happened after that. Couldn’t even tell you how much time passed before the salvage team found me. I reckon they were looking for intact ship parts; I just happened to be a coincidence, but who am I to complain? I’m still around.”

He smiled.

I liked this man. He had heart.

“Took me a long while to recover. I was mighty depressed. Not so much that I had lost my legs, but because I hadn’t died, my family got squat. No payout, and of course, had I read the fine print I would’ve noticed that there was no money for injury only. They would’ve been better off had I died, in that sense. Ah well, such is life I suppose.”

I wish I could say his story was unique but I knew better. Even amongst my own colleagues, many didn’t even recognize their ship crews,  much less care about their well being. They were an unseen and disposable commodity, like any other ship component, except cheaper to replace.

“Look, I’ve just finished warming up.” I lied. “Mind if I work in with you?” I asked.

Malcolm smiled. “It would be my honour, Colonel Wieler.”

I smiled back to him. He was a humble, grateful man, with a good heart. I wanted to surround myself with more people like that, people that don’t forget what’s important in life: family, friends, and looking at the very best in everything.

We had a decent time of it, and when finished, I spoke out to him, “Same time tomorrow?”

“Yes sir.” was the reply.

Indeed. I was going to spend my time getting to know this man, learning from him, sharing war stories with him. I was going to find out his full name, his rank before he was discharged, and make sure his family was taken care of for the rest of their lives, as his own captain should’ve done.

Good people are hard to find. Treasure those you do.

No CCP OhWell, it isn’t a poster sized autographed nude Roc Wieler calendar, but there is always next year if you’re a good girl.

No Tiger Lily Fenix, it isn’t free Aurum or PLEX.

No Jack Carrigan, it isn’t kick ass contests giving away hundreds of millions of ISK, ships, items or swag.

No AideronRobotics, it’s not a kick in the nuts.

Geez, you’re really making me sound pathetic with what I have planned here, so shut the hell up already!

Merry Christmas New Eden

For today, and today only, Today and tomorrow only, you can click on the links below to download the following gifts, from me to you:

• Bio, my original EVE soundtrack – FREE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE 
• One Night of Roc, the soldout Jita concert – FREE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE 
• Mendre, the premiere Gallente nightclub grand opening – FREE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE 
• YC 113, my opus to New Eden – FREE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE 
• Christmas in New Eden, a private album, made for a very special lady in my life as a Christmas gift this year, but you’re getting it too! CLICK HERE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE 
• Mendre: After Hours – Anthems – A sneak peek at my next album! CLICK HERE   MIRROR2   RAPIDSHARE
• A special thanks to Starfleet Comms, Gavin Phoenix, and TheSylance for hosting these files

To all of my loyal fans over the years that have purchased my albums … thank you. Please understand my motives for doing this:

1. It’s Christmas
2. It’s smart marketing
3. It’s for one day only two days only

I will more than likely never give away my albums again, but after this who knows, they’ll probably end up on torrent sites or something anyway.

Oh, did I mention one day two days only? That’s right!

As of Dec 25th Dec 26th, you will no longer be able to download my albums for free, but don’t worry, they’re still available at your favourite digital retailer, and since I’m known for my big heart and generosity I’ll even leave the Christmas in New Eden album up indefinitely… see? I’m a nice guy.

Again, Merry Christmas. No, not Season’s Greetings. Don’t even get me started, son. I said Christmas. Suck it up.

My eyebrow raised.

“Let me tell you something, son. I live every day to its fullest. Everything I do, everything I eat, everything I believe in and stand for; I’m daily proof of it. Do I enjoy my life? Hell yes. I enjoy it so much I almost think I need another clone to enjoy it all!”

“I bet you still don’t eat burgers.” he muttered under his breath.

“Alright, kid. Let me cook us up a meal.”

Roc’s Recovery Burger

INGREDIENTS

• 10 oz ground turkey, divided into two patties
• 4 Tbsp teriyaki sauce
• 2 slices fresh pineapple
• 2 thick slices red onion
• 2 whole-wheat buns, toasted
• 1/2 jalapeno, sliced thin
• 2 slices Swiss cheese

METHOD

1. Cook the turkey, basting with the teriyaki sauce as you go.
2. While the burgers cook, grill the pineapple and onion until lightly charred.
3. Put each burger on a bun and layer on onion, pineapple, jalapeño, and cheese; top with more sauce.

Makes two servings, or one Brutor sized serving.

“Ok, ok, I admit it, sir. That’s a tasty burger.”

I smiled wickedly.

Heart Healthy Burger

INGREDIENTS

• 10 oz ahi tuna, divided into two portions
• coconut oil
• pepper
• 2 ciabatta or focaccia rolls, toasted
• 2 tbsp prepared pesto
• 2 tbsp fat free mayonnaise
• 1 tomato, sliced
• 1/4 red onion, thinly sliced
• 2 cups mixed greens

METHOD

1. Coat the tuna with coconut oil and season with pepper.
2. Grill on high heat for 2 minutes per side, until the outside is lightly charred but the interior is still pink and cool.
3. Serve on a toasted bun slathered with the pesto and mayo and dressed with the vegetables.

Makes two servings.

“Ok, seriously Colonel, I had no idea a tuna burger could taste could but this is too much food!”

The smell of cooking had spread throughout the halls and some of the other pathetic, out of shape, whiny cadets had followed the trail back to my quarters.

“Knock it off, ladies, and have a seat. There’s enough for everyone.” I yelled.

Fat Burning Burger

INGREDIENTS

• 10 oz ground buffalo, divided into two patties
• 4 large romaine lettuce leaves, ribs removed
• 2 fried eggs
• 1/3 cup grated sharp cheddar cheese
• 2 slices grilled red onion
• Dijon mustard

METHOD

1. Cook the buffalo.
2. Lay two romaine leaves together so they overlap slightly, and place a patty in the center.
3. Top with a fried egg, cheese, onion, and condiments, and fold the lettuce over the burger as if making a burrito.

Makes two servings.

“By Jove this is good! Seriously, sir, when did you learn to cook?”

I smirked.

“Son, when you work as hard as I do, you eat a lot. And like I said earlier, I enjoy life. I enjoy eating, so you learn to cook.”

Antioxidant Burger

INGREDIENTS

• 10 oz piece of brisket
• 2 whole-wheat buns, toasted
• 2 tbsp aioli (garlic mayonnaise)
• 1/4 red onion, thinly sliced
• 1 cup arugula
• 1/2 cup sauteed mushrooms
• 3 oz crumbled blue cheese

METHOD

1. Start with a hunk of chuck or brisket and have your butcher grind it fresh. The medium grind is best.
2. Take the meat out of the fridge an hour before cooking.  Rub with coconut oil and pepper.
3. Use high heat. If you don’t hear sizzle, you’re screwed. Cook for 3 to 4 minutes per side, adding cheese at the end. The burger should feel soft and springy.
4. Let it rest 3 to 4 minutes before eating so the juices redistribute.
5. Slather the buns with aioli, then top with the remaining ingredients.

Makes two servings.

I looked around my now cramped quarters. It was good and quiet, no more comments.

I crossed my arms in front of my chest and chuckled. Kids today, thinking they know it all.

I know, it’s a little early, but we’re all going to get very busy soon if we aren’t already.

I know I didn’t have to, and you’re welcome.

Recently, I’ve been very focused on breathing. Better breathing = more oxygen through the blood = better performance during exercise. For example, I can now run a vigorous 5k without losing control of my breath. Some of you might think that means I’m simply not exerting myself enough, but with the amount of sweat I’m drenched in, as well as the high calorie burned count after each run, I think I’m exerting just fine. Not to mention I’m usually damned sore after.

Back to breathing.

I’ve found, like is taught in meditation and many martial arts, that long, controlled breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth, is the key to optimal oxygen intake. It’s a challenge really. I want to huff and puff, feeling old and out of breath, ready to puke, ready to fall over, ready to give in and give up. Then I remember this:

I’m not done when I’m tired. I’m done when I’m done.

I’ve also taken it one step further. When I’m working out with weights or circuit training or what have you, I only allow myself eight deep breaths between sets. An interesting result has occurred, both in myself, and in many of the people I train: when you know you only get eight breaths of rest between exertion, you really make those eight breaths count. The end result is that I’ve seen a dramatic increase in performance from me and my trainees.

Having said all that, I want to share with you a couple of workouts over the next few days that have really kicked the crap out of me, but with much determined willpower, I’ve made it through them (well, there is one funny incident but I’ll get to that later).

Double J, this one is for you buddy!

Jordan Workout

This workout will cover: Abs, Back, Calves, Cardio, Hamstrings, Hips, Quads. If you don’t see an eight breath break between exercises that is because you are now entering a SUPERSET. Do those exercises back to back, no break at all.

• Russian Twist with medicine ball – Set 1 – 30 reps – You know you’re doing it right if your knees go side to side. Really twist from side to side. You may feel like you’re going to rip your core apart, but you won’t. Maintain the seated V position during the entire exercise!
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Russian Twist with medicine ball - Set 2 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Russian Twist with medicine ball - Set 3 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Figure Eight with medicine ball - Set 1 – 30 reps – This is going to target your obliques but you need to keep your entire body tight! Do not be all lose like the guy in the video: he’s just asking for back hurt
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Figure Eight with medicine ball – Set 2 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Figure Eight with medicine ball – Set 3 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Pushup with plank twist – Set 1 – 15 reps – don’t do the walk out pushup part. I just figured the guys might enjoy this particular video.
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Pushup with plank twist – Set 2 – 15 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Pushup with plank twist – Set 3 – 15 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Bicycle Crunches – Set 1 – 100 reps – Do NOT put your hands behind your head. Most people will pull on their neck which is REALLY bad for the spine. Place your hands on the side of your head, just for weight distribution, not for use during the exercise. Also note that your shoulder blades need to stay off the ground at ALL times.
• Wall Sit – Set 1 – 1 minute – The Scott Herman video really says everything that needs to be said about this so pay attention.
• Superman Hold – Set 1 – 45 seconds – You’re going to feel this in your lower back like a mother, but hold the pose!
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Bicycle Crunches – Set 2 – 100 reps
• Wall Sit – Set 2 – 1 minute
• Superman Hold – Set 2 – 45 seconds
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Bicycle Crunches – Set 3 – 100 reps
• Wall Sit – Set 3 – 1 minute
• Superman Hold – Set 3 – 45 seconds
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Skaters – Set 1 – 30 reps – Start at 2 minutes into the video. Lots of good insights into this exercise.
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Skaters – Set 2 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Skaters – Set 3 – 30 reps
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Mountain Climbers – Set 1 – 45 seconds – Keep your butt down and drive those knees to the chest. Pace is important so really push for the burn!
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Mountain Climbers – Set 2 – 45 seconds
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Mountain Climbers – Set 3 – 45 seconds
• Eight Deep Breaths
• Figure Four stretch – 45 seconds each side
• Quad stretch – 45 seconds each side
• Hamstring stretch – 45 seconds each side – notice the back is straight and the stretch starts from the hip!
• Calf Stretch – 45 seconds each side – This narrator seriously helps me relax

Congrats! You did it! Now go shower, you stink of sweat and victory!

Oh, so earlier I alluded to a little incident that occurred the first time I did this workout. So there I am, in a busy gym during evening rush, big jocks and hot fit women everywhere… even seriously built old dude was seriously built!

Anyway, I’m working through this, focused on breathing, in the zone, controlling my movements, maintaining form. I was probably a nine out of ten on the puke scale but was determined to see it through!

Third set of crunches, I was around 80 or so, when an instant an uncontrollable force raced up my throat. I tried to close my mouth but there was no stopping it. Projectile vomit everywhere. I was completely mortified.

Fortunately, cool janitor guy said it wasn’t the first time he’d washed up puke. He was interesting: overweight, baggy clothes, facial piercings, red mohawk; it felt like home. Of course, watching him use one of those old style mop and pails to slosh fresh puke around the gym floor while cleaning probably made many other exercisers want to lose their lunch, and I have to admit I had to leave as the smell got stirred up.

So there you have it, push it til you puke, then keep on going.

I waited until my stomach settled, about three minutes, then pushed through the rest of the workout … in a different room in the gym.

“Hey Roc, just wanted to drop you a line and say hi. I know you’ve been going through some stuff, but we’re still here for you.” – Katia Sae

“Looks like I’ll be in your area sooner than expected. Things are shitty. Hope we can talk soon. Sounds like we each could use a shoulder.” – Caleb Yaakov

“Your blog has gone scarily quiet?” – @KaedaMaxwell

“Don’t you dare post this on your blog saying I’ve been keeping you too busy to write with mind shattering, more than daily sex!” – @CarolePivarik

“You’ve left New Eden, haven’t you. Retired completely and gone off the grid. It’s a sad day.” – Ava Tears

It had been a trying three month period in my life. I was simply unable to find work, yet the expenses still remained. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one that had been in that position. Like many, the economy had been rough during that time, and corporations were laying people off, whether you had been there for decades or even longer. Suddenly, we all found ourselves dispensable.

But I am Roc Wieler.

The initial shock that I was no better than the regular plebes was almost too much for my ego to bear. I was a capsuleer, an immortal. I had been a war hero, a medal decorated war hero for Jove’s sake. Who was I to be in the same position as a Caldari factory worker?

I was the one who inspired others to get out of their pods, to stretch their legs, to take care of their cloned bodies instead of just becoming lethargic and reliant on technology to survive.

I was the one who inspired countless young pod pilots to join the war.

I was the one who had people entranced with music and visuals the galaxy over.

We’ve all been there. We’ve all rationalized why bad things shouldn’t happen to us, and yet it does. Adversity is what reveals our truest character. In that regard, I’ve failed.

I’ve failed to remember to walk the walk when things are toughest. It’s easy to be positive when things are going well.

I’ve failed to believe in myself as much as I should have, allowing myself to spend days curled up in my quarters wallowing in self-pity.

I’ve failed to embrace the greatest support network I have; you.

For that, I sincerely apologize.

So many employment interviews with hopeful outcomes only to have those same hopes dashed to the side. So many people who begged of me to come work with them while I was gainfully employed only to tell me now they have not even scraps to send my way.

But there has been some good:

• I’ve been pushing my workouts harder. It’s one of the few things I find joy in.
• I’ve been learning new technologies, updating my skills, including some advances in three dimensional imaging.
• I’ve been networking, attending functions, getting my name out there.
• I’ve been looking at starting my own corporation, put my money where my mouth is, belief in myself entirely.
• I’ve been working on some new music, refining my techniques, learning from DJs and industry professionals.
• I’ve been continuing to have success as a personal trainer, though I feel like I’ve let down Double J lately.

I’ve been focused on some things, but sadly not on my journal, cutting myself off from all of you.

Again, I apologize.

I will do better. I promise.

—

OOC: I’m not really in a better place now. I still have no source of income. The savings account is slowly drying up. I’m not even sure how I will attend Fanfest this year. Don’t be surprised if I start a fundraiser. My wife has been amazing, understanding, patient and encouraging every step of the way through this tribulation. My few close friends have been amazing, helping me find job leads, offering laughter and free food every now and then, which helps.

Really, it’s just been a few shit kickings too many and I’ve become demoralized overall. But I choose to stand again. Sometimes that is all it can be, an act of will, and my will is stronger than anything this universe can throw at me.

Sure, it may sound like platitudes and cheap self help motivational nonsense, but I’ll tell you this much, it works. Even writing this, sharing with you, being accountable to you once more, is sending the blood racing through my veins, exciting my spirit anew.

So I’m back to having a consistent routine, the life I want to create around myself. Nothing can stop me from doing that. My exercise and eating are still on track, so time to focus on my mental and emotional health.

I have so many stories to write, so much music to create, so much left to give. You, my fans, are worth it.

Thanks for sticking around.

As a bonus treat, here’s a track from the next album I’m working on, Mendre After Hours: Volume 1 Anthems

• Many of us collect bi-weekly paycheques. This gives a chance to establish proper spending patterns on groceries
• 30 days is enough for one to break and rebuild their belief system
• It is enough time for the body to be shocked, to earn muscle memory, to grow into healthy living patterns
• It provides time to fail, to pick ourselves up, to be consistent and form life long habits
• It gives me a chance to evaluate who is serious and who is not
• It gives every body the same starting foundation to build upon

I also notice I consistently have a loyal group of readers. Sometimes there will be a comment from someone new, someone that has only recently fell upon my blog, or has only just decided to comment.

Many of my regular readers have won my contests, so after reading all the comments posted for this event, I have decided to award the Renegade, my prized Republic Fleet Firetail frigate to one of those new to Roc’s Ramblings.

Thank you to everyone for the comments. We all need to know we are supported at times, and to know I have influenced even one life humbles me, and reminds me of how much I have to be thankful for in my own life.

WINNER

The winner of the Renegade is Luk. While his comment may not be as long as others, it is as heartfelt, and as appreciated. Please take good care of my ship.

Contact me with your ingame name, and I will do up the contract.

Thanks to all for your participation in making Roctoberfest a success.

Circuit 2:
plank rows – 10 per arm
jumping lunges – 10 per leg
swing kicks – 15 per leg

Circuit 3:
pullups – to fail
plyometric pendulum lunges  - 10 per leg
steps up – 10 per leg

Circuit 4:
frog kicks – 20 reps
back extensions – 10 reps on chair
pike crunch – 20 reps

Circuit 5:
wide grip pullups – to fail
wall handstand military pushups – to fail
pullups – to fail
rock star jumps – 20 reps